Sofia's Christening Father George at Saint John the Evangelist baptized Sofia Marie yesterday. Maureen stood in as proxy for my mother, Sofia's godmother, who could not be there, and Rick was a Christian witness. Sofia wore an elaborate white gown that made her fair, rosy skin glow and her red hair gleam. She was beautiful, as were her mother and brother, in a timeless sort of way that matched well Father George's limning of the ceremony as he proceeded: "I will ask," he told the families, "'what is it you parents ask of the Church for these children?' You can respond 'baptism'; or you can say 'eternal life.'" My eyes welled up when he said "eternal life," and those words will always catch in my memory with the smell of the perfume that infuses the oil of chrism, with which the newly baptized baby's head is anointed.
It was easy to feel eternity in the ceremony, carried out as it has been for millennia, at once exercising a massive supernatural power on the baptized and an equally potent (and perhaps no less supernatural) social power on the witnesses gathered there.
That's what struck me afterward, as we were standing in St. John's parking lot, getting ready to head back to the house for food and drink and celebration, the social aspect, the community aspect of the event. And my immense gratitude to the people who came to see Sofia ushered into the Church, whether or not they themselves were Catholics or Christians or religious believers of any sort.
Back when David was christened we were not sure whether to invite our non-Catholic or our non-Christian friends and family to the event. Not because we wanted to exclude them, but we were concerned that being invited to a religious ceremony might make someone who was serious about his other- or non-religious beliefs feel uncomfortable or insulted. We didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings by inviting him! Of course, since my mother is the only practicing Catholic in either of our families that would have been an extremely limited guest list ... We realized that we were in danger of succumbing to a hypersensitivity that would probably have an effect opposite the one intended.
We tried to be even broader with our invitations this time around. What would have made most people uncomfortable, we realized, would be
not to be invited to what we, Sofia's parents, believed to be one of the most important moments in her life. Whether someone else believes that or not, he knows we believe it, and knows that regardless of his own religious convictions, he has been invited to witness something incredibly important, even if its practical importance to him is only the result of his understanding of the nature and intensity of our beliefs.
Which all sounds sort of long-winded and convoluted, probably because I don't understand it well enough to explain it. But somewhere in there is the truth at the core of genuine ecumenism - an ecumenism that doesn't have anything to do with watering down one's own faith (or asking someone else to water down his) to get along, but living a faith as resolutely and fully as possible, in community, and in the process developing a fuller understanding of other people's faith experiences and the ultimate goal of each of those.
And for many I think that ultimate goal is similar. As Father George said: "When I ask: 'What is it you ask of the Church for your children?' you can answer 'baptism' or you can be more specific and say, 'eternal life.'"
That's what I asked for daughter Sofia: eternal life in absolute joy of God's perfect love ... and when I thought about all the amazing people, friends and family -- those who came to the ceremony and those who could not be there -- who will be a part of her life as she grows up, I was sure I was seeing an utterly concrete, absolutely quantifiable example of how that great love is already manifesting itself in her life.
Sofia's Christening: The Movie! Rick's daughter Elizabeth gave us a sweet surprise by
capturing the baptism with her digital camera. Maureen is to the left, then Kristen and Sofia, with me sort of behind them, then Rick and Father George on the right.